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	<title>Health Care 4 Me &#187; Funny medical quotes</title>
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		<title>Funny medical quotes</title>
		<link>http://www.healthcare4me.net/funny-medical-quotes/</link>
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		<pubDate>Thu, 04 Dec 2008 16:25:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>John C. Oconnor</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Funny medical quotes]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[funny]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Funny medicine]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[I saw that you liked that funny medicine posts so I decided to write a little bit more about that subject&#8230; Laugh is good for your health so&#8230; keep smiling and enjoy in your life! 1. &#8220;Have you ever been in therapy? No? You should try it. It&#8217;s like a really easy game show where [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p align="center"><img src="http://www.healthcare4me.net/pics/1.jpg" alt="Funny medical quotes (part one)" height="250" width="249" /></p>
<p align="center"><strong>I saw that you liked that funny medicine posts so I decided to write a little bit more about that subject&#8230; Laugh is good for your health so&#8230; keep smiling and enjoy in your life!</strong><span id="more-52"></span></p>
<p align="center"><strong>1.</strong> &#8220;Have you ever been in therapy? No? You should try it. It&#8217;s like a really easy game show where the correct answer to every question is: &#8216;Because of my mother.&#8217;&#8221; &#8211; Robin Greenspan<br />
<strong> 2.</strong> &#8220;After a year in therapy my psychiatrist said to me, &#8216;Maybe life isn&#8217;t for everyone&#8217;.&#8221; &#8211; Larry Brown.<br />
<strong> 3.</strong> &#8220;The nice thing about meditation is that it makes doing nothing quite respectable.&#8221; &#8211; Paul Dean.<br />
<strong> 4. </strong>&#8220;If excessive smoking actually plays a role in the production of lung cancer, it seems to be a minor one.&#8221; &#8211; Dr WC Heuper (1954)<br />
<strong> 5.</strong> &#8220;As she lay there dozing next to me, one voice inside my head kept saying, &#8216;Relax, you&#8217;re not the first doctor to sleep with one of his patients&#8217;, but the another kept reminding me, &#8216;Howard, you are a veterinarian!&#8217;&#8221; -Dick Wilson.<br />
<strong> 6. </strong>&#8220;My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn&#8217;t pay the bill he gave me six months more.&#8221; &#8211; Walter Matthau.<br />
<strong> 7.</strong> &#8220;A woman went to a plastic surgeon and asked him to make her like Bo Derek. He gave her a labotomy.&#8221; &#8211; Joan Rivers.<br />
<strong> 8.</strong> &#8220;She got her looks from her father: He&#8217;s a plastic surgeon.&#8221; -Groucho Marx.<br />
<strong> 9. </strong>&#8220;For the majority of people smoking has a beneficial effect.&#8221; &#8211; Dr Ian MacDonald (1963)<br />
<strong> 10. </strong>&#8220;Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.&#8221; &#8211; Samuel Goldwyn.<br />
<strong> 11. </strong>&#8220;I was under the care of a couple of medical students who couldn&#8217;t diagnose a decapitation.&#8221; &#8211; Jeffrey Bernard<br />
<strong> 12. </strong>&#8220;First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.&#8221; &#8211; Steve Martin.<br />
<strong> 13.</strong> &#8220;No-one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish.&#8221; &#8211; Kin Hubbard.</p>
<p><strong> 14. </strong>&#8220;There must be something to acupuncture. After all, you never see any sick porcupines!&#8221; &#8211; Bob Goddard.<br />
<strong> 15.</strong> &#8220;The operation was a complete success, but the patient died of something else.&#8221; &#8211; John Chiene<br />
<strong> 16.</strong> &#8220;I&#8217;m not feeling very well, I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course.&#8221; &#8211; Groucho Marx<br />
<strong> 17.</strong> &#8220;A psychiatrist is a man who goes to a strip club and watches the audience.&#8221;- Merv Stockwood.<br />
<strong> 18.</strong> &#8220;Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won&#8217;t cure a cold.&#8221; &#8211; Jerry Vale<br />
<strong> 19. </strong>&#8220;I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.&#8221; &#8211; Spike Milligan<br />
<strong> 20.</strong> &#8220;The art of medicine is in amusing a patient while nature affects the cure.&#8221; &#8211; Voltaire</p>
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